It is peaceful here at home as I write this blog post. My children have gone on vacation with their grandparents to Myrtle Beach, SC and they are having such a great time! I am so glad they were able to go.
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I have been trying to do some simplifying of my life this year and especially the past couple of months. I will soon be finished with the LPN program (in July) and I really want to make some major changes by then. I have already been giving a lot of stuff away, trying to declutter and thin out our stuff! We've accumulated so much through the years and there is just something refreshing about having less.
You know, I was reading through some of the posts when I first started blogging. My life seemed so challenging at times and it progressively grew more harried and rushed. However, I look back on those times now and sort of long for those days. I am in a transition period in my life. I am not currently working. I am a full-time nursing student and some days I really wonder what I was thinking to try to go back to school after all these years! My dad is gone now and he was such a source of inspiration and faith for me. He prayed for me, gave me sound counsel, and always pointed me in the right direction if I seemed to have lost my way. Times are tough financially on everyone I know. It can kind of be the pits sometimes!
But, I decided that I am not going to wallow in my perceived misery. I am just going to change the things I can. This is my prayer and my heart's desire:
Reinhold Niebuhr nailed it with this beautiful prayer. That is what I want. I want to accept the things I have no control over. I want to be able to change the things I have the power to, and I want God to give me the wisdom to know the difference so I don't make my life any harder than it has to be.
I think with social media: Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, even places like YouTube or blogs, we can get so caught up in trying to be like someone else, or obtain the status they have, that we sort of lose ourselves. We kind of just get beat up by all of these should-have, would-have, could-have statements we make and then find ourselves wishing for a better car, more money, cuter clothes, or something silly in the grand scheme of things.
When my dad was in the final days of his life, he knew that he was ready to go to Heaven. He had been given the blessing of a long battle with cancer in order to get all of the junk out of his life. His friends that played music with him for years had abandoned him. No longer able to play music, he just wasn't the same guy anymore inside either, and he became estranged from friends who he thought would always be there for him. The stroke that he suffered disallowed him to drive a vehicle any longer. He was weak from the chemotherapy and the ebb and flow of his blood sugar levels as the medication wreaked havoc on his system. He didn't care about ball games on the television, or listening to his favorite music. He certainly didn't care about money or earthly possessions. He would spend hours, sometimes the entire night, laying in bed, praying and talking to God. If he could sit in on this post I am writing today I know he would agree. This stuff down here doesn't matter. Sure it's fun for a while to have nice things or go on vacation, or take part in a particular hobby, but at the end of the day, who are you? What did you contribute to while you were here?
I want to make a difference. I want to matter. I think we all do. I want to leave a legacy of love and goodness to my children and husband should I pass before they do. I would like to know that I am remembered for being kind and compassionate. It won't matter how many videos I have posted, how many subscribers I get to my channel. The number of blog posts I have written won't be that important and I don't think anyone will remember me for posting anything really exciting on social media sites, but I hope that I can live a simpler life... one that has a deeper meaning. Did I make a difference? Did I change someone's life for the better? Was I able to be a helper and not a hindrance? Did I please God with my thoughts and actions? Will my children remember the things I taught them about the LORD?
I don't plan on dying any time soon and I know this subject can seem a little deep, or dark, or somber, but it's something we will all do at some point. I just hope that I can make those changes in my life these next few months so that my life is better, fuller, richer, by things you cannot measure or even understand.
Thanks for hanging out with me today. I love reading your comments so if you want to share some tips on simplifying life, feel free to leave it below. I hope you have an amazing day!
Hugs,
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